Friday, April 28, 2006

Elections 2006

All's quiet on the Western front.


Tuesday, April 18, 2006


Ooh lala. I love Jason Mraz. Funky music, cool lyrics ...

We'll let the geek in the pink take a stab at it
If you like the way I'm thinkin' baby wink at it
I may be skinny at times but I'm fat fulla rhymes
Pass me the mic and I'm a grab at it well
Isn't it delicious crazy way that I'm kissin'
This baby listen to this don't wanna miss it while it's hittin'
Sometimes you gotta fit in to get in
But don't ever quit cause soon I'm gonna let you in but see

I don't care what you might think about me
You'll get by without me if you want
Well,I could be the one to take you home
Baby we could rock the night alone
If we never get down it wouldn't be a let down
But sugar don't forget'n what you already know
I could be the one to turn you out
We could be the talk across the town
Don't judge it by the color, confuse it for another
You might regret what you let slip away like the geek in the pink

I'm the geek in the pink, yeah i'm the geek in the pink


Hey baby look at me go
From zero to hero
You better take it from a geek like me
Well I can save you from unoriginal dumb-dumbs
Who wouldn't care if you com...plete him or not

So what I've got a short attention span
A coke in my hand

Because I'd rather have the afternoon, relaxin' understand
My hip hop and flip-flops well it don't stop with the light rock
My shot to mock you kinda puts me in the tight spot
The hype is nothing more than hoo-ha so I'm
Developing a language and I'm callin' it my own
So take a peek into the speaker and you'll see what I mean
That on the other side the grass is greener


Wednesday, April 12, 2006

Black out + Bus ride = 2 X Inspiration


I am so unfit.

Today go to the 800 metre track. Run 800 metres. Run 3 min. Then cannot make it already.

Black out. Head spin. Off balance. Out of breath.

Then stop already lor. Don't know how to do 2.4 already.

Resisted the urge to cab home after the run. Which was a very good thing.

Coz I usually get good ideas after I black out, and during bus rides.

This time, both happened, so double the power hor!

You see, I have been feeling that I've been harassing my friends to keep me company, in-so-doing being a rather big nuisance to them.

I'm also aware that I have a lot of time to think. And thinking hor... is sometimes not very good. Think then imagine then get upset over nothing. Laggy best.

So ....

I decided that I must find something to do.

I could study something. Maybe a diploma. Maybe a Masters. I think Lasalle-SIA got an MA in Art History, dunno whether got part-time course or not. Lyraine, what do you think? The problem though with studying is that must pay money. NSFs got what money?

I could also volunteer. I have been putting AfA off for some time, should call them up hor.

I could work. Teach tuition is a good idea. hmmm. Occupy time, earn money oso.

I am very keen on a particular job. But first I must research on whether it's actually available, and then bug the guys to give me the job. I don't mind not being paid, just as long as I get to meet people. woohoo! Attempting to get this job will be my project for this week!! Yeeha!

Thursday, April 06, 2006

Troughs and upswings

Well, as an economist, I guess I should know what the bottom most point of a business cycle is called. I don't though, so I must be either a vocabulary-challenged economist, or more likely, the wrong type of economist. :p

Anyway, I expect it to be called the 'trough'.

Last night was the trough for me. Crying in bed; feeling unwanted, unhugged, uncared for, unnoticed, et cetera, et cetera.

In a sense, the annual trough is a good thing, for it's kinda like purgatory. After the trough, during the upswing, I see beauty and kindness everywhere.

I appreciate the concern that friends show me much more. Thanks Jon, Jonny, Omar and Wilson for helping me through last night. :)

The early morning warm shower becomes so much more of a pleasure. The songs of the birds become so so sweet. Chats with friends make me smile more.

I feel more cheery. :) And am singing along to Oliver.

Who will buy this wonderful feeling?
I'm so high I swear I could fly
Me oh my, I don't want to lose it
There must be someone who will buy.
Who will buy this wonderful morning?
Such a sky you never did see
Who will tie it up with a ribbon,
and put it in a box for me?


Who will buy the smell of flowers
waving in the moonlit breeze?
Who will buy the childrens' laughter
happily playing in the streets
Who will buy the heat of sun that's
shining in the deep blue sea?
Who will buy this wonderful feeling?
No one, cuz it's all for free.

Well, well. Positive thinking is the order of the day.


Well. *Hugs & Kisses*

Got to run off to work. :)

Tuesday, April 04, 2006

5 years.

I've been zoning out a bit now and then today, and seeing visions of 5 years ago.

At around this time then, I was wheeling Mummy around the garden grounds of Ang Mo Kio Community Hospital.

We went to the gates, and looked out.

I distinctly remember telling her, that she will soon be better, and that she will be going home with me.

The next day, she did go home. Though not quite in the manner I expected.

I remember that I dropped my mobile phone when I heard the news.

I remember the cab journey to the hospital.

I remember crying through the cab journey.

I remember crying at her bed.

I remember thinking how at peace she looked.

I remember not being to wake her up.

If I let myself zone out enough, I feel that I am almost back to the past. A past I sometimes desperately want to claw back.

Once, I felt a little abandoned and lost. Though I did manage to hide my inner feelings well.

Now, I still feel sad.

And as visions of the past appear to me tonight and tomorrow, as they have always done for the past few years, I will probably be down.

Not down enough to be depressed.

More ... 'recessed'. :p

A hand to hold and to pull me through would be nice.

A song.

Some quiet company.


A shoulder to cry on.

I'm capable of surviving this on my own.

But it would still be nice.

Monday, April 03, 2006

Qing Ming

I don't know the origins of Qing Ming - I am perhaps too ang moh pai to know. I am drafting this without internet access. So cannot google lor.

Qing Ming strikes me as a jolly good idea - a day for Chinese people to visit the tombs and urns of their loved ones who have passed on to the next world. It is a good time to remember these loved ones, and celebrate their lives, and to cherish our memories of them.

Qing Ming's on the 5th of April, which is a Wednesday this year. Therefore, the family decided to go to the cemeteries yesterday, on Sunday, when we're all not working.

Of course, we weren't the only Singaporean Chinese to plan on doing the Qing Ming thing on the Sunday before Qing Ming. We know that, and we kinda expect: traffic jams, people jams, and a PSI index that goes through the roof.

And there were indeed traffic jams, people jams, and a PSI index that goes through the roof. I also got roasted by the sun, and my leg hairs were nearly removed by overly-eager joss-paper bonfires.

Qing Ming at Lim Chu Kang cemetery was quite an experience. It was actually, believe it or not, my first time there. I went along this time because I wanted to visit Mummy.

I kinda forgot that Chinese festivals come with Chinese rituals. Or perhaps, more accurately, I forgot that Chinese festivals tend to be saturated with rituals and 'laws' - the necessary offerings, the number of fruits on each plate, the number of joss-sticks to the deceased and to the Earth Deity, the kinds of joss-paper, the use of confetti-ish paper to make flowers, etc.

So in a way, if one is not careful, Qing Ming might become something akin to Veblen's Machine Process, a mindless repetition of this, that and the other, in a strict order, at each and every tomb visited, to achieve a target aim or a certain output.

And instead of acknowledging the lives of our loved ones, there is a danger of paying more respect to the rituals than to the persons.

Of course, some will argue that the rituals themselves are the right manner to pay respect to the persons. I respect this perspective, but I will rebel if I have to accept it as my own.

I'm not against Chinese traditions and rituals. They have meaning for some, just as rites and rituals (whether these are seen as such) of other races and religions have their own validity, truth and reality.

I'm not against rituals either, for they can be comforting or serve some other purpose.

I indulge in quite a few rituals myself - the tapping of the wind-chimes on the main door before heading off from the house, switching on the music with my toes before stretching and getting out of bed, a deep breath through my comfort blanket before going into slumberland, picking out a matching cap before going to the pubs, grabbing a tight hug before parting with friends, a peek into MSN on a daily basis to see who's there, etc.

I love my rituals, and somehow, these little things make me feel more appreciative of life.

I will probably visit my mum again soon. But, on my own, on a quiet day, at a quiet time, and with my own little rituals.

Sunday, April 02, 2006

Knowing and wondering

From Grey's Anatomy:

"A couple of hundred years ago, Benjamin Franklin shared with the world the secret of his success. Never leave that till tomorrow, he said, which you can do today.

This is the man who discovered electricity. You think more people would listen to what he had to say. I don't know why we put things off, but if I had to guess, I'd have to say it has a lot to do with fear.

Fear of failure, fear of rejection, sometimes the fear is just of making a decision, because what if you're wrong? What if you're making a mistake you can't undo? The early bird catches the worm. A stitch in time saves nine. He who hesitates is lost. We can't pretend we hadn't been told. We've all heard the proverbs, heard the philosophers, heard our grandparents warning us about wasted time, heard the damn poets urging us to seize the day.

Still sometimes we have to see for ourselves.

We have to make our own mistakes.

We have to learn our own lessons.

We have to sweep today's possibility under tomorrow's rug until we can't anymore.

Until we finally understand for ourselves what Benjamin Franklin really meant.

That knowing is better than wondering, that waking is better than sleeping, and even the biggest failure, even the worst, beat the hell out of never trying."

Saturday, April 01, 2006

Straw poll: diffident or confident

Is Wei of ba ba bo bo bar diffident or confident? Overly diffident or overly confident?

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