Saturday, January 28, 2006


Happy New Year, Pull Your Ear!

Brokeback updates

According to the Straits Times and Fridae, Brokeback has been awarded an R21 certificate, but there will be no cuts!! Wheee!!

It will be showing from Feb 16th.

Who's gonna watch with me? :p

Thursday, January 26, 2006

More lines of beauty

I'm still reading that book.

And I love this sentence!

'He knew he was giving off the mischievous contentment of someone left behind for an afternoon, sleepy hints that he might have got up to something but in fact had done the more enviable and inexplicable nothing.'

And these little gems as well:

'Nick said solemnly but feebly, "Well, he was beautiful to." "Exactly!' said Catherine. "People are lovely because we love them, not the other way round."'

'It came to Nick in a flash of acute nostalgia, as though he could never visit that scene of happiness again. He waited a minute longer, in the heightened singleness of someone who has slipped out for a minute from a class, a meeting, ears still ringing, face still solemn, into another world of quiet corridors, the neutral gleam of the day.'

'He couldn't unwind the line of beauty for Catherine, because it explained almost everything, and to her it would seem a trivial delusion, it would seem quite mad, as she said.'

'Some of them were pushy and explicit, but there was always the vulnerable note of courtship: they were asking an unknown man to like them, or want them, or find them equal to their self-description.'


I've finished that book, and boy is it both so beautiful and scary.

Tuesday, January 24, 2006


I got a new 弟弟.


And I just realised, that I am somebody else's new 弟弟 too, though I haven't really spoken to him.


Is my 弟弟 going to remedy that?

Monday, January 23, 2006

Orh orh kun

I was back at 2.15 pm today.

Can't ask for a better start.

Am relatively optimistic, and very excited.



Nap time now. At 3 pm. Woof!

Sunday, January 22, 2006

Rambling rambling ...

The intention was to write something coherent. To write something with a theme. More specifically, the theme of 'beginnings'.

But I'm feeling a tad scatterbrained and unfocused today. And am thinking about all sorts of stuff. So this posting will be, well, in a 'anything goes' mode.

Am just telling tsp about my perhaps irrational dislike for mobile phones. I tolerate having to speak on them. I don't really like to accept them in my life. I don't really know why. I just hate picking up phones sometimes. And today, I'm going to indulge myself and shove my phone under a pillow. I suppose that part of the dislike stems from the presumption that some people seem to have of mobile phone users: that these users are accessible whenever and whereever. I like my space a lot, and an incessantly ringing phone is clearly invasive and erodes my sanity.

A common refrain on birthdays is 'Happy Birthday'. mmh. I very much prefer 'Good Birthday'. Happiness on birthdays may be a bit overrated. Or at least, I don't really expect to be happy on my birthday. Indeed, expecting and wanting to be happy on birthdays can be counterproductive and may lead to the opposite. I prefer 'good', because 'good' encompasses pretty much what I may value at different stages in my life. For now, 'good' is synonymous with 'meaningful', and a good birthday is one that is spent meaningfully. For a 'good' birthday, I don't really see the need for parties, or crave company (though an SMS / text from friends and family would be nice :)). Actually, hugs would be great, provided they are relaxed, casual and relatively wordless.

I'm tired, you see, and I need to recharge. Or maybe to do something else which is different and perhaps refreshing.

Maybe NS will do that trick. 4 monhs of doing nothing is enervating. Perhaps NS will somehow give me a better sense of purpose and direction.


Send me hugs. :)

I need them.


This came via SMS today. :)

I'm staying in today.

Starting work tomorrow, so am kinda stressed about that.

Am not really answering calls or meeting people.

Just a quiet day in. To reflect, to remember, to think about things, to set priorities, to consider directions and reconsider positions.

A day to rest and breathe.

To calm down.

And be at ease.

Saturday, January 21, 2006



I got up of bed very late, at about noon.

Got lunch.

And shoe polish.

Got to polish my formerly white with mold boots.

Now they are gleaming.

Yes, a little shiney.

Going for a hair cut.

Both for the army,

And coz of Chinese New Year,

That thing about not cutting hair during the 15 days.

Then a shower

And a trial run of the uniform.

'Lucky' blokes and gals may get to see.

Then it's TCC at Holland V

With a Rafflesian.

Then it's dinner.

A bit of soothing away paranoia.

A bit of grasping at the line of beauty.

A bit of preening.

Then Tantric.

Then home.

Somehow waking up at home tomorrow seems apt

As a place for reflection and looking to the past.

It was a first day.

It was a beginning.

But a beginning that's no longer quite whole without Mum.


I will think about beginnings.

Beginnings as a theme

Maybe to be posted.

Tuesday, January 17, 2006

A Love That Will Never Grow Old

Artist: Emmylou Harris
Song: A Love That Will Never Grow Old

Go to sleep, may your sweet dreams come true
Just lay back in my arms for one more night
I've this crazy old notion that calls me sometimes
Saying this one's the love of our lives.

Cause I know a love that will never grow old
And I know a love that will never grow old.

When you wake up the world may have changed
But trust in me, I'll never falter or fail
Just the smile in your eyes, it can light up the night,
And your laughter's like wind in my sails.


Lean on me, let our hearts beat in time,
Feel strength from the hands that have held you so long.
Who cares where we go on this rutted old road
In a world that may say that we're wrong.


Monday, January 16, 2006

Wet bum alert

lyraine has, ermz, kindly posted a pix of my wet bum for all and sundry on the internet to view.

Thankfully, I already know I got lousy bum, or else I sure die of embarrassment one lor.

Anywayz, she also sent me a picture that she got from tsp, and here it is:

Lines of beauty

Well, you've prolly guessed it.

I'm reading the Line of Beauty today, and will be posting lines that I like.

Here goes:

'Nick, in his secret innocence, felt a certain respect for her experience with men: to have so many failures required a high rate of preliminary success.'

'Sometimes when he was nervous he asked questions to which he would rather not have known the answers.'

'He loved the hard confidence of his date; and at the same time, in his silent, superior way, he thought he heard how each little brag was the outward denial of an inner doubt.'

'Nick looked down and mumbled, "Do you have to get back?" He tried to smile but he knew his face was stiff with sudden anxiety. He moved his wet glass in circles on the rough-sawn table top. When he glanced up again he found Leo was gazing at him sceptically, one eyebrow arched.'

'He thought he saw the point of kissing but also its limitations - it was an instinct, a means of expression, of mouthing a passion but not of satisfying it.'

'"Look, I''ll see you, my friend," Leo said, as Nick opened the gate. They came out a bit shiftily on to the street, and Nick couldn't tell if the sentence really meant its opposite.'

'"As a teenager, then," Gerald said, "Tobias a) believed that Enoch Powell was a socialist, b) set fire to a volume of Hobbes, and c) had a large and mysterious overdraft. When it came to Oxford, a degree in Politics, Philosophy and Economics was the irresistible choice."'

'He wondered if he could have a crush on this waiter too - it only needed a couple of sightings, the current mood of frustration, and a single half-conscious decision, and the boy's shape would be stamped on his mind and make his pulse race whenever he appeared.'

'Pot was a kind of truth drug for him - with a twist. He had an urge to tell, and show himself as a functioning sexual being, but as he did so he seemed to hear how odd and unseen his life was, and added easy touches to it, that made it more shapely and normal.'

Gosh, this book is difficult reading. Not just because it's a thick fat book and introduces tonnes of characters in it (i.e. people with name memory problems would probably hate the book). It's mainly the style I think that could put one off.

Indeed, style!

Nick, in the book, (at least initially) aimed to study 'style as an obstacle' and 'style that hides things and reveals things at the same time' at UCL.

I am not sure whether I like the style yet. I might like it because it's difficult.

But what I do really really like are the little gems of sentences scattered around, such as those above, that so illuminate stuff.

I think I might just LOVE this book.


Sunday, January 15, 2006


lyraine found an earlier blog of hers, and found this little entry, written on Sunday, March 23, 2003 at 05:33 p.m.

in other news, weijie is coming back from amsterdam tomorrow after having a very disappointing three day skint there.. however, he has found his orientation.. very good.. and sadly has not managed to see the flowers.. lucky bugger... jingliu on the other hand is still away gallivating in italy.. together with aylwin. (not together of course) idiot aylwin.. he who has note-napped my finance ten year series and will only return it to me after he has returned from italy..

I feel like reading my earlier journals as well, but they are locked up somewhere not in easy access.

I remember why I started though. My mum had just passed away, and I felt the need to chronicle everything I remember, because I know memory is not a very robust thing.

I remember scribbling for days during the funeral, feverishly down all the details I could remember: the last place we had lunch at, what she said when, etc. I remember rummaging through the cupboards looking for photographs. I remember flaring up when my relatives wanted to burn her clothes in the funeral ceremony.

Reflecting, I think my mum's passing is probably the most significant event of my life, in that it set off a chain of other events, which all in all have played major roles in shaping the person that I am today.

I think years from now, I will read this and reminisce.

Coffee-ing, dining, clubbing with friends

I wanna have coffee with Manos, Jonny and Ted!!!

But I can't. They're in London. Sighz, I wanna be there too. Jonny's lost too much weight. :(

Have been dinnering and coffeeing with lotsa friends in Singapore though.

Met up with the RJ class for a nibble. Wonderful to see quite a few people, Shilps, Di, C-bo, Rudi, etc. :)

Then had a little January babies Russian dinner thing, with three friends from primary school. (So we kinda know each other for more than a decade liaoz. Gosh.)

Then just had a nice gin rummy session at a cafe, with chelsea5manu0, lyraine, tausarpiah, belle, and jj.

Clubbing ah? Don't have.

But you know, sometimes, even boring people like to be asked. :p

Saturday, January 14, 2006

If you wanna wriggle your toes in your socks...

... wear these.

Feet model: JD Stockbridge

Friday, January 13, 2006


All men dream: but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds wake in the day to find that it was vanity; but the dreamers of the day are dangerous men, for they may act out their dream with open eyes, to make it possible.

TE Lawrence : Seven Pillars of Wisdom

woof woof. Personals can yield little gems like that. :)

Thursday, January 12, 2006


拥抱的时候 心情有点痛 也去提早感受到寂寞

离开的时候 只听见沉默
别对我抱歉 别总觉得对我亏欠
现在他在妳的身边 就对他好一点

既然遇见了永远 就不要说再见
我们经过那么多考验 最后还是回到了原点

总有那一天 相遇的瞬间
确定那些冷漠的从前 已走远
别对我抱歉 别总觉得对我亏欠
现在谁在妳的身边 就对谁好一点

我应该 就走开 就算感情还在
我应该 就放开 对他不再依赖

忘了曾有过的片段 这是属于你们的未来

不要看到你们的爱败给了时间 我能愿选择离别
没有一句怨言 直到你能若无其事聊起了从前
我才发现彼此都了解 默契是最宝贵的语言

Wednesday, January 11, 2006

ba ba bo bo bar movie awards

ladida. Was talking about favourite movies with someone, and then tried to come up with a list of my top ten. Very difficult leh.

Never mind, these are my top ten at the moment.

ba ba bo bo bar Top 10 movies

Beautiful Thing
Billy Elliott
Broken Hearts Club
Life Is Beautiful
Moulin Rouge
Saving Face
Tea With Mussolini
The Hours

(Close calls: Be With Me; Big Eden; Charlie and the Chocolate Factory; Clean; Facing Window; Forrest Gump; Gosford Park; Hedwig; My Dog Skip; Sense and Sensibility (Emma Thompson); Sommer Sturm; Soong Sisters; Those Who Love Me Can Take The Train; 6th Sense)

ba ba bo bo bar Top 4 Favourite Actresses

Audrey Tautou - Amelie
Nicole Kidman - Moulin Rouge
Meryl Streep - The Hours
Maggie Cheung - Clean

ba ba bo bo bar Top 4 Favourite Actors

Haley Joel Osment - 6th Sense
Roberto Benigni - Life is Beautiful
Tom Hanks - Forrest Gump
Jamie Bell - Billy Elliott

ba ba bo bo bar Top 4 Favourite Scenes

Audrey Tautou and Mathieu Kassovitz kissing in Amelie

Linda Henry and Tameka Empson dancing alongside Glen Berry and Scott Neal in Beautiful Thing

Meryl Streep crying out that she's unravelling in The Hours

Michelle Krusiec and Lynn Chen dancing together and snogging when they meet again in Saving Face

An 18 year old writes ...

'The performance of the world's transition economies has been a disappointment.' Is this assessment justified? was an exam essay written in an hour during my 'A' level prelims in 2000. I just found it while rummaging through my stuff. So bored me decided to read it, and then decided to post it.

Goodness gracious, how did we all write that fast in our school days?

Quite embarrassing essay. Some unfortunate imagery, and bad phrasing / prose. But it's ok for a 18 year old lar, hor?

Tuesday, January 10, 2006

Someone who’d answer to me

lyraine hates this song. But I love it and had the lyrics on my profile at Journalhound for quite some time. Jonny just reminded me of this song, by sending me the chorus as a response to Boring bore. woohoo. These are the lyrics.

Someone, Sun Yan Zi

My hair was long and shiny
You said you can’t believe
How could I walk out that door, or walk along the streets…
You told me I should, you know, do some bing bang curly wirly afro thing.
I took your word and did.
Looked in my mirror, “who’s that freak?”

Why does the world deceive?
Why do I make believe?
Took my heel and made Achilles out of me…
Still i would want to be
Someone who’d answer to me.

Someone who sees like a child, gives like a saint,
Feels like an angel — never mind the broken wings,
And speaks like a picture, cries like the rain,
Shines like a star, as long as the fire remains.

The vase beside my bed,
It’s empty beside my bed, it’s empty — almost dead.
"It’s for all the flowers I’m gonna give you,” he said,
And now it’s collecting dust instead.

Why does the world deceive?
Why do I make believe?
Took my heel and made Achilles out of me…
Still i would want to be
Someone who’d answer to me:

Sees like a child, gives like a saint,
feels like an angel—never mind the broken wings,
and speaks like a picture, cries like the rain,
Shines like a star, as long as the fire remains.

Monday, January 09, 2006

Boring bore

Ok. It's yet more navel-gazing again. So look somewhere else if you prefer. :)

The beginnings of this entry prolly came from a night out at Tantric last week. When feedbacking about my experience there, I said that I felt boring there. More properly and accurately, I should say that I felt that according to the implicit rules of the game, in terms of dressing, conversation topic, booze-drinking, I would prolly be classified as 'boring', 'dull' and 'flat' by many punters of the bar.

Not that I mind. That was a feeling coming out more from a clinical and intuitive, albeit maybe perfunctory, observation, than one stemming from a lack of confidence. I'm not exactly very diffident. :p Not that most people can tell maybe?

Call it masochism, but I decided to do a kinda straw poll of 'Am I boring?'. Certainly, this is in the same class of questions as chelsea5manu0's 'Am I fat?', in that the question itself suggests a particular answer, tends to indicate particular insecurities in the asker and more usually than not receives a politically correct, face-saving and, ermz, 'well-considered' answer.

And so, I tend to like frank answers. And appreciate harsh and even mean comments. Every perspective is a valid one, and I hope to accept each of them, even if all of these perspectives together present conflicting truths.

I like to think that I'm interesting in some ways and that I have done interesting things. Let's see. I've promoted soy sauce in a Chinese supermarket to middle-aged ang moh housewives in suburban London. I've stewarded the black lesbians in a Pride parade. I've packed condoms for pubs for hours at a rate of 150-ish per hour. I've run out of a pub on NYE because I had suddenly realised that the floor was sticky with rather too much of a certain body fluid. I've been stalked and done my fair share of stalking. I've been buried in sand. I've done research projects and presented papers in medical sciences, botany, biochemistry, education and economics. I've voted for a chip shop lady to be my local MP.

I certainly have interesting friends too, and they are definitely more than just the descriptive tags that I am identifying them with. Cheesecake-baking tausarpiah. Postmodern urbspedestre. Not-so-silent muse lyraine. Etc etc. I could spend all my life trying to learn every interesting bit from all my friends - the London bus driver, the Singaporean City banker, the Skywalker, the Crawley artist, the American ex-classmate, the Cambridge mathematician, etc.

Yes, it's very tempting to spend lots of time keeping in contact. It's tempting to try to psychoanalyse others as well. The former temptation, I feel, is a good thing, as I hate the idea of drifting friendships. The latter, I feel I should refrain from, for psychoanalysing means a certain amount of judging, a cognitive action that I'm disinclined to indulge in, and is prolly a slippery slope to living life vicariously through their lives (which means I would then be TOTALLY boring!).

Psychoanalysing myself, with the use of feedback from others, is much safer, just as long as I don't psychoanalyse myself to paralysis.

I haven't been able to get hold of William, so there isn't a jibe on Singaporean dronehood on the feedback forms yet. :p

Nonetheless, the feedback has been good, in the sense that it's a good kacang puteh mix of neutrals, positives and negatives.

Let's see.

There's the 'I am not a boring person, I don't hang out with / date / become a boyfriend to boring people' reply.

There's the 'mature, sensible and lovely to talk to', 'lateral thinker', 'fantasy man' set of answers, which don't really answer the question but are kinda ego-boosting. *blush* :p

There's the more relevant 'interesting to talk to' and 'you're too complex to be boring' replies. Thanks. :) Relevance is good. :p

Then, there's also the 'draw your own conclusion' type of answer, which basically involves quoting a list of stuff I don't do, e.g. drink, party, wear contacts, etc., plus a reminder of my lack of confidence and inhibitions, and then, erm, asking me to draw my own conclusion (duh!) from this list. woohoo. Nice. The implied conclusion, I guess, that this guy wants me to reach is that ... 'Hey, yea, I'm a boring bore.'

The nicest thing about drawing my own conclusion is that there are lotsa stuff that I could draw, and that I can weigh the 'evidence' for myself, decide accordingly and consider stuff.

The first thing that struck me is that I wouldn't ever consider anyone who doesn't drink, party or wear contacts, who seems diffident and has defined OB markers as boring. On the contrary, some people who fit all these characteristics intrigue me tremendously. Especially the diffidence bit. Somehow, I'm a bit of a sucker for depressives. Of course, these characteristics are not on my Mr. Right or Mr. Right Now prerequisite list. I've been interested in drinkers, smokers, contact wearers, party go-ers etc. Though not yet in someone with an oversized ego.

The second set of stuff I felt I should consider is my own self-confidence. Am I really as diffident as I sometimes say I am? Why do I say I'm diffident? How confident am I? How lacking am I on the confidence department? Do I have an ego? Or do I somehow lack one?

Well. I think I'm certainly confident and comfortable enough with myself to examine myself in a public space. I accept and am comfortable with the discomforts that such self navel-gazing necessarily brings up. I sure have an ego too, to expect that people will read this verbal diarrhoea and to hope that people will give me comments based on this drivel that I have written. And I'm going to shamelessly going to email this post to some friends. :p

I'm certainly diffident in particular aspects. Going to bars on my own, not knowing anyone there, would in most cases severely test my confidence. Though I have survived such experiences, I don't find them particularly enjoyable. Neither do I find them to be really necessary stages in the quest for manhood. :p I might admire those who thrive on testing their boundaries, provided this testing of boundaries is not just another refuge from life in a broader sense.

By life in a broader sense, I do not mean the realm of perceived normality. lyraine asked me whether I want to be treated like a normal person, which is kinda like Sarah Jessica Parker asking whether one should desire normal kids instead of gay ones. I've thought about this question. A gut instinct would be to say / think: I am not abnormal and do not want to be treated as such. I think I prefer though to challenge the concept of normality. I want to reconsider the bell curve. People are not and should not be in dichotomies of 'straight' and 'not straight', 'fat' and 'not fat', 'boring and not boring', etc. Anyway, I'm kinda digressing and lost the point of this paragraph. But heck. I need to think more about what I DO mean by the realm of perceived normality.

I'm also definitely inhibited in that I have no-go areas. But I like it that I have considered these, and have decided that I want to keep them in place, at least for now. These areas are personal spaces, but they are not no-gos for everyone. I just need to be convinced that these spaces will not be thrashed callously.

I've only ever let one person free-ish access into these personal spaces, and it's been a worthwhile experience. For better or worse, he has seen and been supportive of my various facets. I'm not just cerebral, as this blog might lead a reader to conclude. I'm silly too. I am camp and masculine. I am harsh and softhearted. I am diffident and confident. I am young and old. I am naive and mature. I am simple and complex. I am happy and hysterical and calm and melancholic.

Now, I know I can't and really shouldn't be with anyone who consciously or subconsciously slaps down my various facets. I don't want to compromise. I cannot be shelved into one category or the other. Neither the boring nor the interesting, neither the silly nor the cerebral should suffocate in denial. I don't want another identity crisis.

I have an ego, and one that stems from a reasonable pride in myself. I know my abilities. I know what I can do. I know who I am. Not 100 percent lar, but roughly and just enough. I hope to keep this ego within some semblance of control. One way is through self-deprecatory humour. If I say and confess that I'm boring in some ways, then I can hardly be hurt by charges of 'BORING!!!'. If I know that it's inevitable that I would in some ways follow the crowd, then 'Singaporean drone' would always be an in-joke between friends instead of being an offensive insult it was never meant to be. My ego is restrained and defended simultaneously.

Ok. Enough navel gazing for now. :)

I look forward to comments.

Sunday, January 08, 2006

It's raining cheesecakes ...

... I wish.

It's been raining 24/7 for the past day though.

And I'm sure the world outside is very very wet.

I'm been sleeping loads. Thanks in part to that rowing machine thing at the gym.

And now I've got a craving for cheesecakes.

I've got covered-walkway-shelter all the way to Citylink tcc, where they have superb Oreo cheesecake.

But I'm also too lazy. So far to go lar.

By myself some more.

So some cake from Prima Deli (5 minutes walk from where I am now) might just have to do.

Imperfect substitute, but hey!

I wonder whether there was cake at gege's ceremony. hmm.



Saturday, January 07, 2006

drilbu and tai 双对


It's my gege, drilbu, and tai's civil partnership thingey day today!!!

*leaps around in joy*

Wish the two of ya everlasting love and lotsa hugs. xxxxxx :)

Thursday, January 05, 2006


Ok. I've made just one resolution for this year. To take better care of my gums. I've had enough of bleeding gums. And I'm sure, so has the dentist, who said my teeth were alright, but my gums.....


What has happened thus far in 2006?

True to form, I have been writing dates wrongly. 1st Jan 2005, 020105 ...

Have been to Tantric, and realised a few things: a) I'm relatively boring. b) I'm 'a-stylish'. c) Unlike in London where the drunk people are usually fellow alcohol-intolerant Asians, in Singapore, the ones staggering out are the ang mohs. (Ok, there was a rather small sample size.)

I've been to Kino with H, and found a lovely compilation of Maniam's poetry. Met up with EZ as well, before he set off for training in Brunei.

I've had spicy Thai food, and survived.

I've spoken to Jonny on the phone for over two hours. Talked about boys, friends and more stuff.

I've watched Family Stone with Wilson and Christine. I give the movie 5 stars out of 7.

I've gone to the Times bookfair at the Expo, and resisted temptation successfully.

I've called CPC to harass Pte Ng about my posting.

I've been to my granny's for my grandpa's death anniversary thingey. Where and when I did that fortune-telling thing.

I've been to the gym. And ached in my calves and back for a day after.

I am eating bak kua now. Yummy!

Wednesday, January 04, 2006


This amazing advert is for the engineering geeks, and is also compulsory viewing for those with geek fetishes.

Tuesday, January 03, 2006

School legend

I think I would certainly like reading Singaporean poetry much more as a kid if Aaron Maniam was already published in circa 1996 and the only available compilations available at the time weren't seemingly only of Edwin Thumboo.

Saw Maniam's Morning at Memory's Border at Kinokuniya yesterday, and it's definitely well worth the $17-ish and more.

The following is a sample of his work from an online source (YEP Alumni).

Enjoy, and get a copy of the book. :)

Days Among the Karen
December 2003

‘I felt I was attaining the moving frontier
Beyond which colour and sound may come true
And the things of this earth are united.’
~ Czeslaw Milosz, Mittelbergheim

If truth can lose its trappings
Then it happens here
Complexity unravels to a kernel
Unadorned, open to the earth’s weathering
Under its lattice of mist

The earth is red
Flesh but not blood
Resined like time
From skin, soul

They wai, honour us
Wih Garuda’s greeting
Fingertips to forehead
Delicate balancing
Of the bounty
There can be
In simplicity

Welcome dance
Sword and song
To chase away bad spirits
Minor scales slide into fullness
From the cusp of harmony

The children smile
Shy as creation
Reminders that some things
Are not reduced for having happened
Any number of times before

The bougainvillae kindle
Brighter here
As if richer colour
Is the best protection
From mountain cold

There are saffron robes around the trees,
Planted as each child is born.
There are spirit houses for the dead,
Sentinels to mountain tracks.
These are keepers of the forest,
Keepers of peace and pact,
Of time and truth and testament.

There are dissonances too:
Motor chugs, machine screams
And the unheard agony
Of a philosopher’s tree

But these fade
Leave only arboreal echoes
Leaf rhythms pulsing
Like words once tar and tarmac
Are stripped away, and
The foundations of all our cliches
Are laid

Monday, January 02, 2006


Basically, there's this fortune-telling game that my dear cousin introduced me to. It's actually a bit like solitaire, so one has to think and keep one's eyes open.

The first time I took it, it said that I would be in a stressful situation and also that someone would try to help me with it, but to little avail. This sounds very much like the polygraph ordeal.

Today, I tried it for the second time, to kinda see how 2006 would be like.

The cards I got were:
A pair of '2's with a 4
A pair of '2's with a K
A King

And tada, this was the prediction my oracular cousin made based on these cards:

A: 双双对对: I would get into this.

B: 四面八方: Love is this.

C: 贵人: This will help me achieve A.

D: The 贵人 fella will be successful in ensuring that A happens.


Unlike chelsea5manu0, I do not yet have a New Year's resolution.

Does that imply an irresolute, wavering, directionless and random year ahead?

Maybe having no resolution is the best way forward for someone who already thinks too much.

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